I want to be *that* girl: the one that sets a goal, works her ass off, wins the prize & moves on to the next thing. If I were to die today, the only 'accomplishments' I've achieved were graduating from High School without ever having failed a grade & getting my Associate's Degree. Better than some, but insignificant in the scheme of what I want to accomplish. So. I think it's high time I put some serious thought into what I want to do with my life.
Superficially, I want to be beautiful. I want long, healthy hair; blemish-free, moisturized, and lightly tanned skin; straight, white teeth; long, healthy, manicured nails; and a thin, toned exterior with a deceptively strong core.
Intellectually, I want to speak 5 languages before I die (but will settle for three); to hold advanced degrees (PhDs) in Psychology & Education; to be aware of the policies and happenings of my community and country; to know a little something about 5 different subjects & be able to hold intelligent conversations about each of them.
Creatively, I want to feed my imagination; write several books - including works of poetry and fiction; to play an instrument well (I played the Clarinet in my youth, but I would not call it well); to learn to paint & sculpt; to someday create elaborate scrap books to chronicle my children's lives' to learn to knit, crochet, cross-stitch (at a better quality than I currently possess), & create/sew my own clothing; to learn how to cook & cook well, but healthy; and most of all become a very, very good photographer.
Communally, I want to volunteer & enrich the lives of children & young adults; to work with Habitat for Humanity; to volunteer abroad for a several weeks each year; to support local businesses; to build a strong network of friends, including my family members; I want to build a strong & healthy family that will break the patterns of dysfunction; I want to create an committed & lasting intimate & loving relationship that challenges me to grow, excites & stimulates me, & makes me feel safe and cared for, yet also needed & respected.
Contentment-wise, I want to travel & be active - I want to explore each state at least once, visit each territory in Canada, travel to each country throughout Europe & South America; I want to keep a journal of these experiences so that future generations can ingest that sense of wanderlust and make it their own; I want to be able to laugh at my flaws & my mistakes because I know that I'm doing everything in my power to correct/remedy the situation - that at least I've begun & continued to try to make positive changes.
There's nothing on this list that I can't accomplish: I just need to take a step. Just one step forward in each category, and those will inevitably lead to more steps, and then more, until I'm left wondering why it ever took me so long to begin my journey.
Something that I like about myself today: my ability to find joy in the most insignificant & unexpected forms.
<3, Betty
